Procrastination. Anything will do!

Grudgingly stolen from netherelia.

I want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions. Anything you want. Then go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends (including myself) to ask you anything.

Seems like a keen idea, but you’ll prove me wrong, I’m sure.

49 Responses to “Procrastination. Anything will do!”

  1. avalokita Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 8:35 am

    1) How well endowed are you…in INCHES so I can understand. No metric crap.
    2) What's the air speed velocity of a coconut laiden swallow?
    3) African AND european?

  2. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 8:52 am

    You evil person, you.
    1) 2 inches…
    …more than you think I am. A boy has to have his secrets, after all. 🙂
    2) My guess is that the average swallow could never lift the average coconut, so your question is hereby declared null and void, wisearse.
    3) This is not a question, but a sentence fragment. If it pertains to the first question, I imagine 2 more inches if African, 2 less if European but really curvy. If it pertains to the second question, then see the answer for #2.

  3. avalokita Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:25 am

    Questions numbers 2 and 3…
    DO NOT tell me you've never seen Monty Python's Holy Grail?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?

  4. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:28 am

    Monty who? 🙂
    Yes, sweets, I was just being logical about the whole thing…and realistic. And trying to be a wisecracker, just like you!
    And clearly failing! 🙁

  5. avalokita Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:21 pm

    Oh I'm sorry. <:*( I'm stoopeed.</p>

  6. evils Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 5:35 pm

    What if they held it under the dorsal guiding feather?

  7. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 9:40 pm

    A good idea. Can we test it?

  8. avalokita Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:20 pm

    "They could grip it by the husk."

  9. dangerine Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 8:43 am

    1, 2/3 a statement seeking agreement
    Do you consider yourself to be more open minded or judgemental when it comes to other people and understanding their motivations?
    How would you describe your relationship with your mother, and do you feel how a man treats his mother is related to how he eventually treats a female mate or partner based on that relationship dynamic?
    Aren't fart jokes the best kind of humor?

  10. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:00 am

    Re: 1, 2/3 a statement seeking agreement
    Good questions.
    1) I am *extremely* judgmental of other people's behaviour, as much as I try to temper it with patience and empathy. I don't think that being judgmental and open-minded are mutually exclusive conditions, rather one can be open to others' actions and intentions and still judge them in one way or another. I think in the past I have been close-minded with both others' motivations and intentions, and have often superimposed my own best interests over those of my friends; this is something that I am on a sincere quest to negate and remove. But I'm always open to learning about others and from others. And often I use my impressions of their motivations as a gauge to judge them better. Make sense?
    2) Well, Mom reads this journal from time to time, so I'd better watch me bum, if you know what I mean! Seriously, our relationship has been up and down for many years. Sometimes very close, sometimes with long periods of non-communication. Lately, she's been going through a life-changing transformation that has very much helped her reach out for happiness and move past scars and trauma from the past, and I applaud that enormous effort.
    No, I don't think the relationship dynamic with a man's mother sets the standard for his further treatment of women. Not at all. I suppose that some people are more easily impressed upon with such patterns, but I see no correlation in my own life whatsoever.
    3) Does the pope shit in the woods? 🙂

  11. dangerine Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 2:54 am

    Re: 1, 2/3 a statement seeking agreement
    3) …only at Easter when the Easter bunny is close at hand.

  12. podle Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 8:47 am

    If you had to name each of your knuckles, what would their names be?
    When you dream of being able to fly how do you move when flying (i.e., swimming through the sky, arm flapping, gliding like a squirrel)?
    What would you really love to, but are too embarassed to, do?
    (apologize for the awkward sentence structure there).

  13. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 9:16 am

    1) I will answer this in finger-only mode, and then simply with the ten that I use for punching. Saves time, you see.
    (Starting from the thumb and working toward the pinky)
    Left hand: Frank, Olaf, Bubba, Juanito, and Carmine.
    Right hand: Sven, Roger, Lilly, Farthringham, and Jeeves.
    2) When I dream of flying, it usually involves falling – or rather, plummeting. Perhaps it's my Taurean nature reminding me that humans are meant to WALK, hence our LEGS, but I can't remember a time that I actually flew in my dreams. Am I too grounded for my own good?
    3) A good question, with many possible answers. I think I wouldn't mind being in a well-produced porn movie if I had the guts. But then I'd be all shrively, and quite unproductive. And really, I'm too much of a monogamist, and not well suited to the rigours of hard thrusting on camera. Hey, you asked!

  14. velvetdahlia Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 6:32 am

    Those are totally rad finger names, dude! Little Jeeves… I'm dying here! That's so funny.

  15. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 15th, 2004 at 10:59 am

    *wiggles little Jeeves at you*

  16. podle Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 9:17 am

    Nice answers, thank you. I find the inclusion of Lily particularly amusing.
    And yes, yes you probably are too grounded for your own good – but then I'm a Gemini and hence totally untrustable in most regards (particular those involving gravity or, say, having only one opinion about anything).
    See – I've never gotten the porn movie thing. Public sex, yes (conceptually anyway, now that I'm getting all older and wiser and stuff) – but recorded? Where anyone can see it? Over and over again? Yeeeeg. That just gives me the whim whams.

  17. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 15th, 2004 at 11:01 am

    Whatever the whim-whams are, I would very much like you to give me some.
    I think.

  18. podle Says:
    April 21st, 2004 at 3:11 am

    You are adorable. It just has to be said.
    I don't think you want me to make you all shivery and uncomfortable, though. At least, I'm pretty sure you don't.
    Besides, I'm verging on becoming an old married lady, and so should most likely cut down on being shiver inducing. At least somewhat.

  19. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 24th, 2004 at 7:26 pm

    A thousand marriages could never do that to you, darling.
    But you might be a bit bitter by the fifteenth or so.

  20. mxhaunted Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 8:55 am

    Dear me. I though this sounded a good idea when I read it but from the questions you’ve been asked… I definitely ain’t doing it! 🙂

  21. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 9:03 am

    Shit, man. You said it!
    Shoulda *never* written this one down.

  22. scotis_man Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 10:55 am

    1) Coke or Pepsi?
    2) Classic Trillogy or Special Edition? (and Why?)
    3) If you were to be stranded on a deserted island and could only have 3 books, what would they be?

  23. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:16 am

    1) Neither. I no longer drink colas; they're more addictive than alcohol and miserable on one's stomach lining. If I had to choose, though, it would be Coke.
    2) Classic Trilogy, because all that extra time and money that Uncle George put into the new ones was an utter waste of resources. It looks terrible. The charm of Star Wars is its atmosphere, only hindered by this misnomered 'update'. And we all know that Greedo doesn't fire first. 🙂
    3) Hard question! I'd have to say:
    a. All three volumes of Robert Forbes's 'The Lyon in Mourning' (1895-6)
    b. The 1906 edition of the Oxford English Dictionary
    c. Lord Dunsany's 'The Hashish Man' (1910-16)

  24. seide Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 3:24 pm

    1. If you could be one person in history, experience that person's upbringing and education, live that person's life, and face that person's death, who would you be?
    2. What one superpower would you choose to have?
    3. Lastly, (I might as well go this route, every-goddamn-one else is) boxers, briefs, or just what is your preference in underwear, and have you ever worn women's underwear?
    Jesus, this is like a slumber party. Next we'll all be sloppy drunk and trying to spin the virtual bottle.

  25. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 9:55 pm

    Oh, boy. These are juicy!
    1) There are so many, but Alexander of Macedon comes to mind. He was educated, respected, feared, loved, successful, imperious, and successful (did I mention handsome?). No one alive in the 4th century BC had ever seen anything like him before. He seemed to have an underlying sensitivity underemphasised in historical accounts, and though he died mysteriously and under the pains of great illness, the triumphs and glory that he saw, as well as traveling through so many parts of the world, might have been worth it. And he is held powerfully in human memory – either with love or hate – to this day. But this was really a difficult choice, and a good question.
    2) To blow powerful jets of snot through my nostrils that could incapacitate criminals and ne'er-do-wells? To be able to turn things plaid with a single touch? Actually, I'd probably want True Vision, so that I could see what people hide, what is at the bottom of the oceans and buried underground, and to be able to see naked boobies – all the time. Okay, that last one is optional. But wouldn't you? 🙂
    3) I prefer boxer-briefs, the best of both worlds. Sometimes, nothing at all, depending on the trousers. And no, I've never worn women's underwear. Should I? Am I missing something?
    *spins the virtual bottle*

  26. seolta Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 12:01 am

    i feel bad hijacking someone elses q&a but it's just too juicy to resist… of course you should try womens underwear!!
    It's a whole different ballgame (if you will pardon the expression) and i tell you what… just thinking about a guy wearing my knickers? phew, sure does it for me 😉

  27. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 12:30 am

    Hijacking isn't the word! Was more like…pants-jacking! 🙂
    I'll remember your comment, darling. Hehehe.
    *searching frantically for appropriated female knickers*

  28. agntprovocateur Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 3:56 pm

    sheesh, i your mom reads this… tell her it's ALL my fault.
    1. prefer to top or bottom, or a little bit of both?
    2. "what's is the sexiest non-sexual thing anyone ever did to you?
    3. if you and S.O. were to have kids- prefer a boy or girl? why? and what would you name him/her?

  29. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 10:33 pm

    Mom, it's ALL her fault!
    1) Little of both. I'm actually quite vanilla. Gentle, connective, personal, intimate. Disappointed? 🙂
    2) I find that when someone connects with my geeky side, it's actually a real turn-on for me. Be it a bit of inside humour about the gaming industry, some buried historical anecdote, or fervent love of all things Apple, it's like rubbing a spot on my belly that hasn't been touched for a long while. Moreso, I'm really turned on by witty banter, wordplay, and a mutual love of that kind of conversation or correspondence.
    3) I think I'd want a girl, though a healthy child of either sex would be a true blessing. Her name, I believe, would be Xana Rayna.

  30. velvetdahlia Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 6:34 am

    such a bottom! (Hi, mom!)

  31. lekvar Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 4:08 pm

    1. Would you rather lose hearing and vision in your right ear & eye, or your left ear & eye? Why?
    2. Is Scotish bog paper scratchier than American? Any hoop-shaped calluses?
    3. List all non-solid substances with which you've had skin contact over the past 24 hours.

  32. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 10:42 pm

    1) I'm left-eyed, so probably my right of each. Although really, I'm terrified of losing either or both. Can't imagine what it would be like to know about the beauty and terror of the world and not be able to experience it through vision and sound.
    2) They've got quite the selection of papier de toilette over Scotland way. Colors, textures, scents…I think that I would rather pay good money for soft and springy (my bum deserves nothing less!) than skimp for the harsh n' scratchy. And no, it isn't of tartan design. Although I would certainly buy it if it were available.
    3) Oh, man. That's dirty. Um, water, oxygen, carbon dioxide, incense smoke, elderflower spritzer, a shot of CK Be cologne, and some deviant HP sauce.

  33. evils Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 6:53 pm

    (1.)Who sang,
    "They told me all the hymns were born
    Out of the saxophone,
    And I went down to test them all
    Beneath the Tijuana moon,
    I saw violence in the moon
    Two broken lovers strong and strewn,
    I drank myself into a dream.
    (2.) What is your favourite quotation?
    (3.) Who are the brain police?

  34. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:03 pm

    1) That would have to be Tim Buckley. Have I listened to him: Yes. Did I know this without Googling: No. Do I like his son better: Yes. 🙂
    2) a) "There are no happy endings…there are no real endings ever – happy or otherwise…sometimes we come together for awhile and sometimes we're apart…but all the while, the Story just goes on. And no matter how much one or the other of us might want it to be different, both our stories are true. But I can't stop wishing for a happy ending." – Charles de Lint (from The Ghosts of Wind and Shadow)
    b) "I've never met anyone who made it with a chick because they owned a Tom Waits album. I've got all three, and it's never helped me." – Tom Waits
    3) With wishful thinking fancifully conjured, the Brain Police come around to the homes of those who do dishonour to the human condition by lying, cheating, and stealing; bullying, raping, and being selfish…the Officers forcefully apprehend these transgressors – fat-cat politicians, neds, gangsta boys, selfish ex-lovers, and emo kids, and insert a small, tube-like device within the criminal's cerebellum. These cads are then released back into the world after a harsh scolding. Should they resume their evil ways in any measure, the device then emits a sonic resonance that forces said asshole to stop what they're doing, cluck like a game hen, and pronounce loudly, "I'm not worth the air that I breathe!"

  35. nickys Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 8:37 pm

    What's the best thing about the USA?
    What's the worst thing about the USA?
    Where would you like to live and work when you finish your research?

  36. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:48 pm

    I had a feeling that your questions would have something to do with this…
    1) The best thing about America is twofold: a) Opportunity in the country, for academic, economic, and personal advancement, is unparalleled elsewhere in the world. There are more chances to DO things, and to make something of one's self, in more ways throughout the nation than anywhere else I can think of, and b) the diverse nature of community, landscape, culture, and society provides a forum that ensures that opportunity and possibility. It's a huge country, with huge resources.
    2) The worst thing is that a large percentage of the American population doesn't give one shit about the answers to question #1. Part of this is reflected in the the present ruling administration, but moreso this disregard is conjured and represented by a national, pseudo-patriotic elitism, tempered by a comfort level (two cars, two kids, picket fences, and MTV) that only exacerbates the problem. People are comfortable with their lives, so they don't need to look beyond themselves, to advance, or to be philanthropic or humanistic. They can always turn the TV off and pretend it doesn't exist…whatever 'it' may be for the day.
    Regarding that pseudo-patriotism I mentioned, allow me to post this excerpt from Norman Mailer:
    "In a country where values are collapsing, patriotism becomes the handmaiden to totalitarianism. The country becomes the religion. We are asked to live in a state of religious fervor: Love America! Love it because America has been a substitute for religion. But to love your country indiscriminately means that critical distinctions begin to go. And democracy depends upon these distinctions. – from 'Why Are We at War?'
    3) When I complete my degree here, I must return to the Bay Area for a few years to follow a project I've long been yearning to tackle. That will be in San Francisco, the loveliest city in America. But I feel an undeniable pull and intrinsic comfort here in Edinburgh, as I always have known I would. So I'm coming back one day, not too far in the future. It's something to strive for once I get back home, and something I intend to make good on. This environment is too wonderful to pass up, even if the opportunity is a bit harder to slog through over here. To me, quality of life is quite dependent on environment.

  37. angledge Says:
    April 13th, 2004 at 11:02 pm

    1. If you were going to get to make an addition to the holiday calendar, what holiday would you add, when, & why? How would this new holiday be celebrated?
    2. Congratulations, you've been crowned King of Scotland! Besides declaring war on England, what other action items are high on Your Majesty's agenda?
    3. Can you suggest one introductory book for a non-specialist to read in the field of your dissertation topic?

  38. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 1:47 am

    1) Serendipitous Day, which changes randomly every year. This holiday is an international affair, and ensures that people around the world drop *everything* to just exist doing gratifying things around the people that give them the most happiness. There is no mould, and there is no requirement, stress, or huge plans required to make it memorable each year. It's just extemporaneous and necessary, and we deserve it.
    2) That's King Dubh Arden I, thank you very much, and after the brief and unprotracted invasion of the south to rape oilfields, agriculture, and chippy shops, I would immediately initiate the following directives:
    a) National mandate to take holiday leave 'round the country for one month out of the year, to become more in tune with this majestic country and what it has to offer. And plentiful public discussions and conversation on the differences between misplaced nationalism and national pride.
    b) Ensure that all the puke on Scottish burgh streets is immediately cleaned up for fear of the continued trapping of oblivious passers-by in quicksand-like, acidic purgatory.
    c) Finish the goddamned Parliament building.
    3) Hopefully, there are no books on my dissertation topic! But as for suggesting something related, I shall name three:
    a) From a social and cultural perspective: 'The Jacobite Risings in Britain 1689-1746', Bruce Lenman (Scottish Cultural Press, 1980).
    b) From an antiquarian/romantic perspective: 'Origins of the '45', W.B. Blaikie (Scottish History Society, 1916).
    c) From a military perspective: 'The '45', Christopher Duffy (Cassell, 2003).

  39. seolta Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 12:20 am

    1 Who are your three favourite poets or lyricists (with an excerpt)?
    2 What book or story had the biggest influence on you as a child that you still feel today?
    3 What is your favourite sensation or feeling?

  40. velvetdahlia Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 6:39 am

    So many questions! This is a labor-intensive meme.
    What is the kilt question to which one answers, "Nothing, ma'am, it's working order"? (damn. I always mess up jokes)
    Have you ever been to a Ren Faire, and how did you fair there?
    When you come back to SF, where will you live in the city?

  41. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 15th, 2004 at 11:17 am

    1) "Excuse me sir – what's worn beneath your kilt?"
    2) I have; worked the Northern California Ren Faire for two years in (gasp!) the Scots guild before the entire show was bought corporately and fired all of their living history actors to make room for craft stalls. I would never go back, due to the distillation of motivation and talent now present in the historical faire circuit. Not that I was any special addition; I would simply rather research, publish, and teach. But it was a good excuse to chase skirts and share time with friends. And drink. I wouldn't trade in that time. I can assure you, however, that the real thing is much better! 🙂
    3) Good question. It depends on what is open and affordable when I get back. My first choices are Cole Valley, Inner Richmond, and Pacific Heights, as if I could ever afford to live in the latter! I would settle for somewhere along Divis, the Nob Hill area, or the USF-side of the Panhandle.

  42. kimmaline Says:
    December 6th, 2004 at 6:33 pm

    I have; worked the Northern California Ren Faire for two years in (gasp!) the Scots guild
    Good thing for me! Well, and many many others.
    before the entire show was bought corporately and fired all of their living history actors to make room for craft stalls. I would never go back, due to the distillation of motivation and talent now present in the historical faire circuit.
    Thank you for phrasing that better than I have been able to in…what…seven years?
    I wouldn't trade in that time.
    Neither would I. Not for a million of ANYTHING.

  43. FunkyPlaid Says:
    December 7th, 2004 at 2:19 am

    You're a dear; look at you, digging into the annals of my LJ!
    I have mixed feelings about those times, Kim. It was really the beginning of my adulthood, and that particular time in my life was my first stab at establishing myself as a person, so I attach very good and important memories to our stint in the guild. Of course I, like many others, felt attacked when the event was bought and corporately fucked with, but I only went back once as a spectator, and never to the new sites. I simply feel that I've outgrown that time now, and though I hold fond memories to it, I cannot believe there are still people doing the same damned thing as they were doing over a decade ago.
    I mean, how do the costumes still fit?

  44. kimmaline Says:
    December 13th, 2004 at 6:21 pm

    I have mixed feelings about those times as well, but for different reasons. They were very loving times for me…being a kid in a severely fucked up situation I appreciated the sense of family I got from being out there. Exactly like you, I felt fucked without even he benefit of getting kissed first when we lost the gig.
    When I have gone back as a spectator, which I only did one time at the Nut Tree (although, the same thing happened at Dickens) it was a strange scene. Of course, by this time, I had a restraining order against a well known faire participant, resplendent with the accompanying drama. Many people were less than happy to see me.
    Now, with what my life has been through, and the growing up that I have done, I have some interesting reactions. Part of me would kill for that level of support again…but looking back I never truly had what I thought. There were a lot of people who were great to me, and I appreciate that immensely, but there were a lot of people that started then and have continued to be monumental fucks to me. I used to take that, but no more! I am far more picky with who I surround myself with at this stage of my life, and faire doesn't really lend itself to that level of justifiable discrimination.
    I always assumed that my children would be raised out at faire. Obviously that isn't the case anymore. But I still feel something of a sense of loss, if for nothing else than for that perceived state of belonging.

  45. kittynitro Says:
    April 14th, 2004 at 12:04 pm

    Double Header
    This game is difficult. A girl feels that she is plagiarizing Zobmondo, but I've only played it once. Anyway, here are mine:
    1. If you could switch places with anyone (living, dead, real, fictional, me, etc.), who would you chose and why?
    2. What were the circumstances of your happiest childhood memory?
    3. If you had to decide between being alone forever or never getting private time ever again, which would you choose?
    Bonus #4 question: Xana Rayna?
    Bonus #5 question: What country would you identify with/fixate on if Scotland didn't exist?
    Bonus #6 question: What is your favorite, non-swear foreign word?

  46. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 15th, 2004 at 11:45 am

    Re: Double Header
    1) You, definitely. Or Jilly Coppercorn, who is the central character in Charles de Lint's stories. She sees magic, and crafts it with humbleness through her art, and is ever on the quest to Learn and Grow and See, in every sense of the words. Or Gatsby…or Tolkein…or Steinbeck, because real or not, they all led full, varied lives containing both splendid fantasy and harsh reality.
    2) I remember quite fondly that my Grandma used to prepare an ersatz stuffed animal for me every time I came over to spend the night. Each time, she would take a pillow from the couch and murder a fresh, white pillowcase with a new and varied face drawn in black permanent marker. You would think that she would reuse the same pillowcase, or gently remind me to bring a stuffed friend from home, but she never did. She is *still* that giving and loving.
    3) This is perhaps the most difficult question ever, as both are integral to my sense of happiness. I imagine that whichever I choose would have me begging for the opposite before too long, but I would have to say that never getting private time again is the lesser of these evils. Being alone forever is too bleak, and too scary.
    Bonus #4) Xana was the girlfriend of Andrew Wood, deceased singer of Mother Love Bone. I can't tell you how much that band and Andy's death affected my life and formed my identity at the time. I always wanted to offer some sort of reciprocity for that time, and I love that name anyway. And something about Xana Rayna Layne really flows beautifully.
    Bonus #5) Egypt, most certainly. Or Italy, because I'm white and can fit in better. 🙂 But Egypt is SO amazing, culturally, archaeologically, historically – in so many ways. I'm fascinated with that country as it is, and very nearly focused on Egyptology in school so many years ago. I might still find time for it at some future date, to more than a nominal degree.
    Bonus #6) 'Smeddum', which *sounds* like a swear word! It's actually Old Scots for the kind of spirit which is uncomplaining and indomitable, which just gets on with things.

  47. kittynitro Says:
    April 27th, 2004 at 3:22 am

    Dude, your smeddum's showing!
    I thought I'd wait until you got home to respond to this. I love your answer to number 2. I think your grandma sounds absolutely wonderful, from this anecdote. I agree about number 3. I'd do the same, but I'd be really miserable that way. And, yes, "smeddum" does indeed sound like if not a cuss word than an anatomical one.

  48. spiffington Says:
    April 16th, 2004 at 8:00 pm

    Ok as promised…
    1) If you had to get rid of your dreads (for some reason), but only 5 came away intact, what would you do with them and why?
    2) If you had to choose between the games career OR pursuit of your history passion (one or the other), which would you plump with and why?
    3)Pursuit of eternal happiness and self fulfilment in ALL your dreams and desires but being alone for the rest of your life; OR settling for mediocrity and an overall average time for the remainder, with the person you care for and want to be with most?
    *bonus* You can only travel to one more place in the entire world before you die, where would it be and what would you do there?

  49. FunkyPlaid Says:
    April 27th, 2004 at 4:08 am

    Re: tricky?
    Oh, man. Make 'em harder, why dontcha! 🙂
    1) I will get rid of my dreads, eventually. Otherwise they'd be getting caught in the car door and around the bike chain and stuff before too long. So I have five left, eh?
    Dread #1) One goes to Fairy Glen on Arran, to be buried next to something very important that is already there beneath the ground. With a little cultivation, a dreadlock tree will grow in it's stead.
    Dread #2) This one goes to Ev, perhaps to be batted about for some time by wee Ivoux.
    Dread #3) Of course one is for Krystine, to be threaded into hers.
    Dread #4) I would like to unravel one, like worsted wool, and have it woven into a garment that I would wear often, perhaps a hat or a scarf.
    Dread #5) If I don't keep one for myself, I'd be negligent in remembering everything that gets soaked up by the nappy, little antennas. But not buried away in the closet; right in the open; tied to my bedpost or something of the like.
    2) History. In the long run, though games are social, progressive, and fun, the resonance and personal gratification that comes from understanding sweeping themes and exacting details of historical significance far outweigh anything else I've ever experienced. Besides, games are no fun alone, and all we really have is ourselves…can't take Ravensburger boxes with you when you go…and sometimes it's hard to find people to come out and play on a school night.
    3) Nothing about life should be mediocre or average. It's the extremes and the overwhlems that make life so spectacular and beautiful. To fulfill all my dreams is a dream in itself, and the pursuit is most definitely a big part of the fulfillment process. That is the anti-settle, this chase, and the alternative is to settle. Might as well die, because mediocrity is unforgiving and breeds regret and resentment at the end of a long, average life. I would miss that Person greatly and mourn their absence every day, but I would strive on for Fullness in everything I do, regardless.
    Bonus) I would go to Florence, and drink lots of lovely red wine, stomp on the Bull's plums a few time at Uffizi, and weave my way amidst pale statuary and marble columns until late into the night. I would sit and listen to street musicians, throw them much coinage that I'm not familiar with, and leave a trail of multicoloured olives in my wake, slyly hiding behind an old stairwell and waiting for a buxom, curly-maned, Mediterranean brunette to come and pick the pimentos out of my holes. Oh, yes I would.

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